I hate repeating myself and hate missing everyone. Especially you! Even if it doesn’t make any sense, here’s the letter I sent an old professor to let him know why I’m applying to MFA programs and what I’ve been up to:

Dr. Clauss,

Thanks for replying promptly. Again, means a great deal.

Business first: I started at Butler in the Fall of 2002 and graduated in 2006. I’m applying for an MFA in Fiction because I think it’s more of a challenge.

Odds and sods: I don’t mean to hurt anyone. Seriously. See, I have this condition. In all seriousness, I usually consider myself the beneficiary of my relationships. It’s a constant surprise that, you know, people want to hear from me. All of this is evident in that I open up pretty quickly.

You were pretty active with the hockey and mountain biking. You can budget for the Oreos.

I am in Evansville, and since graduation, I’ve been managing movie theaters. It’s a locally-owned chain, and I fill in a few shifts at the discount house and am the personnel manager at a first run theater no one seems to know exists. Also, I don’t have an actual title, but I mean, I have to call myself something. It’s fun but not fulfilling. I enjoy working with high school kids because my exposure to them is limited. A lotta times, I use the time I spend waiting for movies to get out, usually an hour or so, to write. That’s nice.

But it’s a bit of an island. I miss talking about writing more than I miss writing itself. Does that sound weird? I miss tutoring especially. There’s not really anyone around to sit around and talk about high-minded composition theories–and that makes me sad. My fiction’s always been really boring and my academic writing was always sort of clawing at the edges–so I guess I’m saying I don’t quite know what I have to offer in my own writing, but I’m pretty sure I can isolate what makes writing good and encourage it in others. I think of how all of my professors–neat word–encouraged that in me, and that’s what I want to do for others.

Google is still as creepy as ever. However, and I owe this to you, I am two of the top three Google results for my name. The zenith of human accomplishment? I say so. If a person can’t be the best at something, he can at least strive to be the best version of himself.

I don’t know much about hockey other than it looks really good in HD. Did you use your promotion to buy a HD TV? If you didn’t buy or previously own one, you can tell your wife that I said you should. One last hockey thought: I love loudmouth athletes because they realize, for all that sports has accomplished socially as an institution, they are playing games. Sean Avery cracks me up.

I totally understand what you’re saying about the two kids on their bikes. I don’t work at the same theater I did in high schools, but I love seeing the kids–my kids–screwing up and around and each other the same way I did. It’s a pleasant reminder that, I dunno–actually I can’t quite articulate why that’s so comforting.

Yours in gratitude,
Jason.

P.S. First thought best thought! Same with drafts. I forgot to say I’m not on Facebook. See above. I really can’t stand missing all those people, like Holden Caulfield. Hopefully that’s not an omen.